NaPoWriMo Day 5: Champion

let me be your champion, he said
let me stand by your side
let me be there for the highs and the lows,
let me inside your mind

tell me the things you yearn for,
but don’t tell me what turns you on,
your body tells me more than your words ever can
the darkness you seek, reborn

show me how much you want this
enough to give me your devotion and pain,
and I’ll give you the calm you’ve been searching for
my touch, the balm to the darkest desires you can’t name.

Mine – 29

should we meet? she asks him
do we dare?
will you be kind the first time?
will you be gentle?
for i’m not perfect
and it’s been awhile
since someone said i was beautiful
it’s been a damn long time
till a soul starts to wither
till it strays in search
of a touch that seeps deep within
for another soul to merge
so should we go ahead with it?
should we dare
throw everything to the wind?
will you be there?

    *This is for National Poetry Month, where I’m writing on a theme. Inspired by Álvaro de la Herrán‘s video for GQ Spain called Mine

Old Books

sometimes I look through old books
for fragments of my past
an airline ticket maybe
something that was never meant to last

maybe half of an old greeting card
I’d cut to remind me of you
of the many ways you told me you loved me
and just how much I meant to you

or maybe a dried pink flower
picked up on a lonely walk
that day you said we would last forever
oh, how you assured me it wasn’t just talk

or maybe a short note
written on the back of a theater stub
‘sorry i can’t make it, babe, gotta work,’
just before everything we had blew up

so I close those old books forever
no point in dredging up the tears
not when my life turned out so much better
than the life I had with you all those years

 

Liz Madrid © 2015

Mine – 10

why do you love me?
she asks
as he runs his fingers
through her hair
is it my submission
that turns you on?
or is it the power
you hold
over our sweet affair?

you hold the power,
he says to her
with a look,
a safe word
there’s nothing that I do
that’s ever meant
to hurt you
for nothing between us
is ever blurred

This is for National Poetry Month, where I’m writing on a theme. Inspired by Álvaro de la Herrán‘s video for GQ Spain called Mine

 

Mine – 5

your newest toy
feels cool against my skin
as anticipation builds
making my heart sing
and when you trace it
along the curve of my hips
you don’t have to say
anything
to prepare me for its sting

so sharp, so divine
this pain i know
is all mine
to feel, to drown in
as i fall deeper within
the secrets i’ve long ago
kept hidden,
now come
bidden

*This is for National Poetry Month, where I’m writing on a theme. Inspired by Álvaro de la Herrán‘s video for GQ Spain called Mine

Mine – 4

there are days when
i feel so un-beautiful
when my hips
look just too-wide
but then i catch you
watching me from where you stand
and i know then
that i’m more than
all right

more than the woman
i think i am
more than just skin
and strong bones
i’m so much more
because i know you love me
i’m so much more than anyone
outside of us
knows

*This is for National Poetry Month, where I’m writing on a theme. Inspired by Álvaro de la Herrán‘s video for GQ Spain called Mine

Mine – 2

2

he dominates me
because i let him
he dominates me
because that’s what he is –
a man who treasures me
and loves me,
who knows me so well,
he lays out
my darkest fears

but lest you think
he can do whatever he wants
it’s with my consent
that he can
dominate my heart
that yearns for submission
with a look, a kiss,
even the sweet sting
of a firm hand

*This is for National Poetry Month, where I’m writing on a theme. Inspired by Álvaro de la Herrán‘s video for GQ Spain called Mine

Standing Appointments

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Today, while bitching and moaning about how I had no control over my former massage studio, where I only use it one day a week since I decided to focus more on my  writing and raising my little one – which unfortunately means that so many people use it on the other days of the week and break my things that are still in there without any consideration to me* – my client said something to me that made it all worthwhile.

While scheduling his weekly appointment for the rest of the month, he told me that he wasn’t going to make one of those weeks since he’ll be out of town.  So I said, “good!  Because your slot is highly sought after.  Now I can fill that with someone who wants it.”

Then he said, “Well, they’ll have to wait till I die, because I’m not giving it up till then.”

I’ve been seeing this client since 1999, by the way – same time each week.  And his words, after so many years of being his massage therapist, truly made everything else seem so mundane.

It even made my day.

* My co-renter rents out the room to whoever bodyworker or energy worker needs to use the room for a few hours, which leaves my poor neighbors so confused.  But this was a huge lesson of letting go for me last year.  You can’t have everything, after all…sally-field-oscar-speech-o

Memories Of My Father

When I look at my son, I see his love for his father
and his father’s love for him
undying, never wavering
something that stems only from within
Yet when I think of my own father,
the well of memories run dry
there’s a bit of this, a snippet of that
there’s not a lot, no matter how hard I try
but one memory does stand out,
and it’s an obscure one at best
it’s when I woke up from surgery
and there he was, holding my hand, at rest
his eyes were closed, as if he were sleeping
and when I stirred, he, too, awoke
stroking my hand, avoiding the pic line
my own voice barely a croak
“Anesthesia can give you amnesia,” he said
“and I hope that you’re okay.”
But I knew then that even if I forgot all
I’d never forget that day
For that’s the only time I ever saw him
so vulnerable and so alone,
he loved me the best he ever could
doing everything so I could stand on my own.
But amnesia hits me now as I sit here
thinking of moments that we once shared
for all that comes is when he stroked my hand that day
a hero so vulnerable, his greatest weakness bared.