unscathed

moving on, moving on,
tell yourself one last time,
you need to move on.

be authentic. set your true self free
for there are so many people out there in need
of the gifts you bring

let go of the past. release your mistakes,
the ones that keep you locked in that dark place,
let go of the self-hate

love the woman you used to be
just as you’ll learn to love the woman you are now
for no one gets through this life unscathed somehow

so move on from the sadness. let go of your fears
and claim all the good that is waiting for you.
this is your year.

In Blackwater Woods by Mary Oliver

Look, the trees
are turning
their own bodies
into pillars

of light,
are giving off the rich
fragrance of cinnamon
and fulfillment,

the long tapers
of cattails
are bursting and floating away over
the blue shoulders

of the ponds,
and every pond,
no matter what its
name is, is

nameless now.
Every year
everything
I have ever learned

in my lifetime
leads back to this: the fires
and the black river of loss
whose other side

is salvation,
whose meaning
none of us will ever know.
To live in this world

you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it

against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go.

“In Blackwater Woods” by Mary Oliver, from American Primitive.
© Back Bay Books, 1983.

a new year

it’s a new day, a new year
and for the first time last night
i went to sleep without you
whispering in my ear

i’m sad. but i’m relieved, too,
for this means i can finally move on
and live my life without
this need for you

a parting gift maybe, that last goodbye
for you were never meant to stay
or be my friend, and now it’s time
to let your good intentions die

for it’s a new day, a new year
time to let go of the things that no longer
serve me like the loneliness
i’ve always feared.


post-it note

i found a post-it note from you today
it fell from the book you last read
tell her she's beautiful, you wrote 
words you whispered as you kissed my forehead
the day you told me i'd find love again
that all i had to do was close my eyes
and you'd be right there with me
and that we'd both be just fine
that i'd always feel your love wherever i went
as i'd run headfirst into love
i just had to trust myself again
        and then you were gone


blue

it’s been eleven days since you left
and i think i’m doing okay
the words have finally started to flow
they come more and more each day

but sometimes i see something
that inevitably reminds me of you
followed by that familiar tug inside my chest
before i tell myself not to feel so blue

for you are where you need to be right now
unencumbered and free
you’ve moved on and one day, I will, too,
even if sometimes it’s not that easy

new moon

i drew the new moon card today
it told me what i already knew
that there are things i now need to undertake
even if it means letting go of you

so you can go your own way
and discover everything that awaits you
new lessons and new loves along this new path
while still keeping dear everything you hold true

so don’t look back. just keep going
for in the end, I’ll be okay
I’m just so proud of everything you’ve accomplished
it’s a new moon, a new beginning… a new day.

worthy

i wasn’t ready for your goodbye
even though i had a feeling you were leaving
but you left me with something i can never repay
you reminded me to never stop believing

that i am beautiful
that i am worthy
that i have so much to give
as i continue on this journey

to love myself again
and accept everything that I am
the wrinkles, the curves, even the scars
for nothing about me is a sham

and although i’m not ready to say goodbye
it’s time for me to let you go
let you live the life you’ve always wanted
you deserve more than you’ll ever know

for you, too, are beautiful,
you, too, are kind
you are worthy
and i think we’ll be just fine.

armor

it’s one big exhale
this thing called letting go
punishing ourselves believing
we reap what others sow
every damn time
it’s all so unrelenting
the blame, the guilt, the fear
all of it, unforgiving
until the moment comes
when the armor we wear starts falling apart
revealing tired and battered souls
and broken broken hearts
it’s going to take time
to trust ourselves again
learn to love and laugh and cry
and live beyond the pen

over you

i’m over it
i’m over you
i’m done figuring out the whys
i’m done thinking of you

because at the end of the day
it boils down to this:
i kept on going
and you simply quit

so i’m done with the wondering
i’m done with the regret
it’s time to move on along
but to never forget

that life can be beautiful
life can be kind
there’s so much to be discovered
just waiting for the right time

but only if you believe
life’s constant ebb and flow
that some days you win and some days you lose
and some days you just have to let go

Body of Lies

her body tells her things
she doesn’t want to know
so many lies uncovered
no matter where she goes

that she has to do this thing or that
just to fit right in
when it only takes her the farthest
from who she really is within

when every scar gets hidden
and every imperfection denied
her body never lies though
it uncovers every truth she tries to hide

and as her mind overrules her
and always undermines
her body tells her anyway
every single time

trust yourself, it says to her,
you know what to do
don’t listen to the naysayers
who’ve long forgotten their truth

it’s in your every heartbeat
and every word you say
it’s hidden behind your smiles
when you say, i’m okay

until the day you face the truth,
confront each self-fulfilling lie
your body will always tell its truth
even when you let its real beauty die

2015  © morrighansmuse