no one knows how deep our scars run
and sometimes not even we do
until someone comes and traces the marks
and to our horror, the wounds open up again
too soon

far sooner than we were prepared to staunch the flow
of not just blood, but memories and shame
the very ones that kept us scarred and broken,
long after we’ve forgotten
their names

but for your words and the sound of your voice,
this time something was different
for together with the stigma and the blame
that may have accompanied them, there, too,
was redemption

an acceptance that none of it was my fault
or my own doing, nothing i deserved or asked for.
and i can finally move on because you saw something
i long forgot, that i am worthy and i am worth
fighting for.

some days

some days i fall
and some days
i don’t.
some days
i’m the best
I can ever be
(like being your
‘good girl’)
while on other days,
i won’t.

for some days i refuse
to give you up
although some days
i do.
and other days
i tell myself
you were never mine
to begin with,
and some days,
it’s true.

and then there are days
when i wake up next to you
and i know then
i must have done
something good
for some days i fall
headfirst into love
and every single
time i do
it’s with you.

discarded notes: 9

no more questioning.
no more doubts.
believe me when i say
that you are the one for me,
or do i need to shout it out
just so you’ll know
how much you mean to me,
for you are my sun,
my moon, my stars
and right next to you
is where i yearn to be
through hell or high water,
near or far.


don’t ruin the moment. this questioning
has got to stop for what we have
is unlike anything we’ve experienced before,
passion, devotion, even love from a simple spark.

a smile, a look, a whisper
was all it took for you to claim me.
a kiss, a touch, a whimper
are all i need to know you’re mine to keep.


tell me the things you dream of when no one is looking
whisper them in my ear so only i can hear
about the things i do that make your heart go a-flutter
tell me everything before this moment between us disappears

for nothing can last forever
not even the moments we treasure inside our hearts
believing them safe from envious prying eyes
who want nothing more but to pick our love apart

and fling everything we once shared in the cold and dank wind
laugh in our faces and say, oh those poor souls
so tell me now those secrets you’ve long kept hidden
before they rip apart two hearts that were once fully whole

catch yourself

catch yourself, the little girl said, 
before you fall too far and too deep 
for those feelings you feel are nothing more 
but a quick high for those who fall asleep 
and lose themselves in their dreams 
of love, passion, and utter devotion, 
a promise that he's true only to you 
when you know too well 
     it's but a hopeless notion
for his heart belongs to someone else
and you knew that from the start 
so catch yourself before you fall deeper 
and lose what little is left of your lonely heart 
but should you continue to play, 
know what waits for you in the end. 
dreams shattered, hearts broken, 
and that emptiness that no words from any man 
     can ever mend

discarded notes: 6

there’s nothing sexier
than the honesty you bring
to the table as to what you can give me
and what you cannot, or where
the boundaries between us lie
so nothing we do is an afterthought.
for what we have is the raw deal.
although complicated,
what we have is real.

more than a wish

days like this are made for smiling,
giggling at the sound of your voice,
the words you say making me happy, giddy,
your messages of hope rising above the noise
of a world that wants only to distract me
from all the things that don’t matter in the end
for the most precious thing right now
is the sight of your soulful eyes the moment
we stop to pretend that what we have is temporary,
fleeting, and gone too soon
for you are more than a wish I whispered
upon a falling star. you are my sun
and i, your moon.

the dance

with every brush of his fingers
against hers, she sensed every emotion,
every glance caressing her like a lover,
his gaze holding more than just her form.
he held her heart.

And every time he let go,
she felt the chasm grow,
only to knit itself back
the moment he drew her
in his arms again.